Have you been around some abuse victims episode recently? or is there in your memory some past abuse?
This is what happened yesterday: in a general store, getting things for my kitchen, all the decor was full with different kinds of red hearts…Of course! It’s Valentine’s Day!….
Suddenly I found myself grabbing one of the balloons…and my left hand felt curiously small, kind of tiny…it would not let the balloon go as I went through the cashier. She rang everything up and I found myself walking out with a gorgeous red balloon with the “I love you” message screaming across it.
My rational mind asking: what’s going on here? why did you buy this balloon? who is this balloon for?
And the answer was loud and clear: this balloon is for my inner child abused…Of course! she needs to hear from me, her adult self, that I cherish her!
As I never forgot her completely, the abused child she was, but went through periods in which I could only remember the painful parts of her life I wanted so much to forget, now I have a better picture. I can see all her creativity, her survival skills deploying under extreme duress, emotional child abuse and constant lack of appreciation. I can see her resourcefulness to find small joys in a bleak childhood, which translated into being a smart survivor now…she survived her child abusers with all her heart intact!
And this is a good opportunity to tell her, with all my love, that I recognize her, appreciate her tenacity and ability to resist oppression from her child abuser without denying the joys of life. She was a joyful survivor, never a bitter one. Always founding in a bit of sunshine, a flower, a smile, the energy to keep living, learning and dreaming a better future…Of course you are my Valentine!
To my inner child, the victim of emotional child abuse, but also of physical abuse, now I’m sending this loving Valentine; you deserve it more than anybody else. Wherever the alternative time you are in now, you are in my heart, always…thanks for surviving everything and bringing me here and now!