Similar to other types of abuse, emotional abuse is something you should not ignore. Every day thousands of women are reported being physical abused by their husbands. However, the agony of emotional abuse was and is rarely mentioned. Do you have the courage to heal?
Due to the complexity of emotional abuse, emotional abuse victims will stay much longer in an abusive relationship than the physically abused person. Fortunately, getting over and healing from emotional abuse is relatively possible. All it takes is courage to heal, time and perseverance.
In an abusive relationship, your abuser will isolate you from your friends and family. Generally, emotional abusers want only one thing from you: total control.
It is not love that they need but it is the power of domination. Emotional abusers can make you feel useless and unworthy. Though they won’t admit it, they are individuals in fact insecure of themselves. They want to control you so that you won’t leave them.
The abuse usually starts after the marriage. Prior to that, most abusers are loving, caring, and affectionate individuals. The torture begins after the abuser isolates you from your friends and family.
A typical abusive relationship consists of the dependent and dominant party. Abusers effectively dominate the lives of their victims by making their victims dependent on them. As a victim, you will not have enough courage to fight back because of fear of his escalating anger, and possible retaliation.
In addition, you are barred from joining activities external to the couple. You also need the permission and approval from your abuser before you are allowed to be doing things independently. As a consequence, healing from emotional abuse may take time and effort. In fact, getting out of it alive is very complicated as you are having low and lower self esteem and confidence.
Most victims cannot leave their abusers due to the constant fear they feel and the feeling of being unlovable. Some won’t leave because they are still hopeful that the relationship can be fixed. Well in fact, giving false hope is an abuser’s manipulative strategy.
Healing from emotional abuse starts first with the sheer realization of your situation. Realizing that you are a victim of an abuse will put you on your feet and build up courage to defend yourself. You can only build courage to fight back if you see how the relationship is making you deeply unhappy.
You cannot heal simply by staying in an abusive situation which is not addressed and left to run its course. However if your partner is willing to seek professional help, it will be your decision to stay or not to stay, according to what you see about the possibility of him changing.
The mental and emotional effects of abuse typically linger afterwards.You can cope easily if you surround yourself with your friends and family, specifically the people who love you and make you feel worthy and loved.
Another benefit of this, you will be well protected from your abusive husband as most of the times abusers stalk their victims after they abandon the unhealthy spousal situation.
Do something that you love and enjoy, every day. Start living your life the way as you want it. Pick a hobby that will enrich and educate you. Build up your confidence and self-esteem by participating in self development programs accessible around you, and keep doing them regardless the demands of your ex-partner about your return.